


this might be all i ever wanted

by radam (ididitmyway)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Alternate Universe - Single Parent, Fluff, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Non-binary character, Other, Trans Character(s), Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:34:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24596110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ididitmyway/pseuds/radam
Summary: Tsukishima Kei is a single mom, and Ushijima Wakatoshi is the beautiful new neighbor across the street.
Relationships: Tsukishima Kei/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 42





	this might be all i ever wanted

There’s a moving truck across the street this morning.

Kei isn’t surprised at this development - the house’s past inhabitants moved a few months ago. She isn’t surprised at the fact that there only seems to be one occupant, either; the neighborhood is good for single people and small families. No, what makes Kei pause in the living room, second cup of coffee in hand, in her pajamas, is the occupant themself.

She looks out the large window and admires strong legs, thick arms, and wonderfully broad shoulders. She notes the way the new neighbor does all of the moving-in by themself, lifting boxes and plastic tubs with ease. Something else that gets her notice is the sheer amount of greenery that is taken out of the truck, set on the front walk, walked into the house. She allows herself another moment to gawk before resolutely turning her head to the side before the rest of her body. If Mayu caught her staring like that, she’d be more than a little embarrassed. 

As if summoned by that thought alone, Mayu shoots across the living room to stare at the spectacle of a stranger moving into their new home. “Wow, that’s a lot of plants for one person,” she comments, before declaring: “I’m going to make brownies and we are gonna welcome them like the good neighbors we are!”

Kei takes a long sip of her coffee before responding. “Oh, really? And when is this welcome party?”

Mayu considers this for a moment as Kei drinks more of her coffee. “This weekend! On Saturday?” She turns around to look at Kei, who hums for a moment, bringing a hand to her chin. “Mom, I know you’re not busy on Saturday; you’re never busy on the weekends.”

Her frankness makes Kei let out a loud laugh. “Well, if you know so much about my boring weekend life, why did you ask?”

“Because I was trying to be polite!” Kei laughs again - they both know Mayu’s going to do it either way, and Kei’s not going to stop her. “Can we go to the store tomorrow for ingredients?”

Kei walks over and kisses the top of Mayu’s head. “Of course. Shouldn’t you be heading to school now?” 

Mayu hastily gathers her things, puts on her shoes, and flies out the door.

-

That Saturday, the two of them head across the street as planned. Mayu, holding a container of brownies, practically skips up the path. She knocks on the door as Kei stops next to her, putting a couple feet of space between them and the door. As the door opens, Kei realizes that she was definitely not prepared to meet any handsome strangers today.

The person standing in the doorway is just a touch shorter than Kei, more solid-looking up close, and their face is...breathtaking. Brown hair, cut short but just the slightest bit floppy on the top, with calm, steady hazel eyes and a strong jaw. Their expression is neutral - not showing any hostility or tension, but not anything that suggests any signs of welcome, either. Kei eyes them carefully.

“Hello, my name is Tsukishima Mayu and it’s nice to meet you!” Mayu holds out the container with a bright smile. “I made these brownies to welcome you to the neighborhood!”

The new neighbor blinks down at the container before taking it, consciously keeping it level with both hands; it’s like they’re holding something made of glass instead of tough plastic. When they speak, their voice is a rich baritone, with very little inflection. “Thank you very much. My name is Ushijima Wakatoshi; it’s nice to meet you.”

Kei’s mouth twitches at the clear pronunciation and formal speech, and she brings a hand up to her mouth as she clears her throat, hiding her smile. The sound makes Ushijima turn their attention to her, and she thinks now would probably be a good time to actually say something. “Tsukishima Kei; Mayu’s my daughter. We live across the street.”

“It’s nice to meet you as well, Tsukishima-san.” Ushijima bows their head in lieu of a handshake, still being so careful not to jostle Mayu’s gift. Kei breaks eye contact after a moment, feeling heat at the tips of her ears. Mayu beams up at Ushijima, looking pleased that her gift was accepted. “I don’t mean to be rude, but I have to leave shortly - I need to pick up Akira from a friend’s home nearby.”

“Is Akira your son, Ushijima-san?” Kei deeply appreciates Mayu’s curiosity.

“No, he’s my dog.” Mayu’s eyes and smile grow wide with excitement. Something about Ushijima seems to soften all over, which Kei can understand - it’s very difficult not to be affected by Mayu while being in close proximity to her bright smile. “With Tsukishima-san’s permission, you’re welcome to meet him. He enjoys meeting new people.”

Mayu’s wide eyes look up at Kei with hope written all over her face, as if Kei is even capable of saying no to her right now. She puts her arm around Mayu’s shoulders, smiling at her. Kei turns her attention back to Ushijima, who appears to have been looking at her the whole time, awaiting her response. “That’s perfectly fine.”

Ushijima nods, looking satisfied. “Good. I do apologize, but if you’ll excuse me, I must be going.”

“Of course,” Kei nods at them. “It was nice meeting you, Ushijima-san.” Mayu gives Ushijima a quick bow and another smile before the two of them turn around and head home.

As they step inside the house, Mayu speaks. “So…”

Kei looks at her, eyebrow raised. “What?”

“Ushijima-san seems nice,” Mayu says definitively. Kei can’t say she disagrees.

-

The following afternoon, Ushijima returns the visit.

Mayu sees them approaching with a healthy, happy-looking golden retriever on a leash, and she’s off the couch and out the door in two seconds flat. Kei carefully folds the corner of the page she’s reading before standing from her spot by the window. She slips on a pair of sandals and a cardigan before stepping out into the afternoon sunshine, closing the door behind her.

Ushijima’s already looking at her when she turns around. “Good afternoon, Tsukishima-san. I hope I’m not interrupting anything - I just wanted to make sure that Mayu-san was able to meet Akira as soon as possible.”

“Hello, Ushijima-san. No, not at all.” Mayu has definitely met Akira, Kei can see; she’s knelt in the grass petting Akira and scratching behind his ears while he stays in a perfect sit and thumps his tail on the ground. “If anything, you didn’t come soon enough,” she jokes.

Ushijima frowns a little. “Oh. I didn’t want to be too presumptuous about Mayu-san’s free time - or yours - so I thought this afternoon would be better, as opposed to last night or this morning.”

Kei blinks a few times before speaking. “I was joking, Ushijima-san. You picked a good time to visit.”

“Then I am glad I came at this time.” Their frown is still present; Kei doesn’t want them to fixate on the misunderstanding, so she goes over to Akira and holds out her hand for him to smell. Upon receiving Akira’s quick consent, she runs her hand over his head and down his neck. Akira, of course, is immensely pleased at this turn of events. “How old is he?”

This has the desired effect, in that Ushijima is no longer frowning and has a small, barely-there smile on their lips. “Akira is five years old; he will be six on the twenty-first of next month.”

“He’s a very good-looking dog, Ushijima-san,” Kei smiles at Akira, who is still being showered in attention by Mayu, who seems to care about little else. Kei notes that Akira has been sitting still this whole time, not trying to run around the yard and experience the smells. “You must’ve worked hard to train him this well.”

“Thank you, Tsukishima-san. Akira has always had a good temperament, which made training him go very smoothly. He does well off-leash also, though that’s only at dog parks or other enclosed areas.” When she looks at Ushijima, they look pleased; if she wasn’t looking for it, Kei might have missed the way they stand just a little straighter, or the spark of pride in their eyes. All because she showed interest in their dog and offered a couple little compliments.

Kei is...well, if Kei didn’t know any better, she’d say that she rather likes Ushijima Wakatoshi - that she wants to ask more questions about Ushijima’s dog, their houseplants, _anything_ to feel their quiet waves of happiness wrap around her shoulders like the softest blanket. That Kei would invite them into her life if it meant she could always see the way the sunshine makes their hair and eyes look lighter, and, maybe, watch a smile bloom across their face.

But Kei does know better, so she locks these feelings in a secret section of her heart, and files these thoughts away in a far-off corner of her mind.

-

“Mom, how much longer are you gonna stare at Ushijima-san?”

Kei turns her head to see Mayu standing in the middle of the living room with her hands on her hips. “I wasn’t staring, I was...watching.” Mayu lifts her eyebrows. “What?” Mayu lifts her eyebrows even higher. “Oh, fine.” Kei stands up from her usual seat and goes to the kitchen, trying to hide her blush at being caught so obviously.

“It’s okay if you like Ushijima-san, you know that right?” Kei pauses. She turns around to see Mayu looking…concerned? She’s frowning, her black eyebrows furrowed and her eyes wide. “I thought, maybe, you were trying to hide it. So I just wanted to tell you that it’s okay.”

Kei looks at Mayu, feels her sincerity, and smiles. She wraps Mayu up in a hug, and says, “Thank you for telling me.”

-

When Kei adopted Mayu, she felt like she adopted the sun. And if Mayu was the sun, the very center of Kei’s universe, then Kei was a planet orbiting her light. She brightened Kei’s world - she brightened Kei’s soul, her heart, her whole self. Having Mayu for a daughter was a gift, and it was one that Kei knew she would treasure always. 

As she sits on her bed that night, the weight of what Mayu said rests heavy on her chest. 

She promised she would give Mayu everything she could, and all Mayu had to do was shine her bright, warm light on Kei; Mayu’s rays would help Kei flourish. And yet, the simple statement of _it’s okay if you like Ushijima-san, you know that right?_ echoed throughout her mind, its vibrations traveling down her bones and brushing against her heart. That secret room inside her heart - the one that holds her longing, her wants, her romantic tendencies - longed to be opened. Does Mayu know about that room? Is Kei really so transparent?

Does Kei even know how to find that room at this point? And, more importantly, would she be able to go inside?

-

The following Sunday finds Kei alone at home. Mayu’s studying with some school friends, and will be back later sometime that evening. It’s 2:00 in the afternoon, with only a few clouds in the sunny sky. She idly wonders what Ushijima’s doing as she looks out the living room window.

_Go over there and find out_ , her heart says. Kei listens.

The sun feels nice on her arms and face as she pulls the door closed behind her. The slight breeze circles her ankles, causing the bottom of her skirt to swish as she walks across the street. She hears the sound of her sandals slapping on the pavement as she goes up the front walk towards the door. She pauses with her fist in front of the door, just for a moment, before knocking. The door opens, and time stops.

Ushijima Wakatoshi is wearing a dress. It’s a deep purple color, and sleeveless, without any patterns or designs. The neckline is high, dipping just enough to show a peek of Ushijima’s collarbones; the waistline is neither too snug nor too loose, and the hem stops just at the tops of their knees. The fabric looks soft, and Kei feels the intense urge to reach out and catch it between the tips of her fingers.

When she finally manages to drag her eyes up to their face, she notices that Ushijima’s cheeks are flushed, and their posture is stiff. “Hello, Tsukishima-san. Would you like to come in?”

Kei hears the requests in those words: _please come in, I’m not sure who else will see, I don’t think I want anyone else to see_. She carefully brushes past Ushijima as she steps inside. As they step a little further into the house, Ushijima’s posture is still stiff; they’re nervous.

“I’m sorry for just coming over like this, Ushijima-san. I don’t want to intrude on your privacy.” Kei stands in the entryway, bunching up the fabric of her skirt in her hand. She points over her shoulder towards the door. “I’ll just show myself out.”

She turns to leave, when Ushijima speaks. “Wait.” Kei turns back towards Ushijima, who still looks uncomfortable. “You don’t have to leave. I...well, I suppose I should offer an explanation.”

_Oh_ , Kei thinks, compassion and empathy blooming inside her chest. She smiles a tiny, careful smile. “No, Ushijima-san; you don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

“I just - well, in the past, people have asked why, and this is new to you - that is, seeing me like this,” they gesture to the purple dress they’re wearing. “I don’t want you to feel. Uncomfortable. Around me.”

“Ushijima-san,” Kei says, as gently as she can, “I’m not uncomfortable around you. I appreciate you sharing this with me. And…” 

Ushijima’s face is etched with worry, with anxiety - but there is also, just for a second, a flicker of hope in their eyes. “And…?”

Kei takes a deep breath, and speaks: “I’m trans.” 

They look at her, their eyes widened. Kei rushes to say something else, anything else to fill the silence. “Of course, this doesn’t mean that you _have_ to feel comfortable around me, and I don’t want you to feel like I’m trying to - to imply that you are too, I just thought that -”

“Tsukishima-san,” she is gently interrupted, and Ushijima looks relieved, their eyes lit up with the recognition that comes with finding out that someone _gets it_ , that you’re not alone like you thought you were. “Would you like some tea?”

Kei blinks once, twice, before exhaling the anxiety out of her shoulders. She nods, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear; she slides her feet out of her shoes before following Ushijima into the kitchen. As Ushijima prepares their tea, Kei takes the opportunity to actually admire the interior of the house.

There are plants everywhere - on the windowsills, hanging from the ceiling, on tables and countertops, resting on shelves sticking out of the walls. There’s small, round succulents and cascading, leafy vines, and flowers, a few delicate things sitting out in the early afternoon sun. Kei doesn’t think she’s ever felt so at home in a space that isn’t hers before. It feels tranquil, quiet. Like the only time that matters is the time spent inside these walls, among the peaceful feeling one gets when surrounded by plants.

“Here, Tsukishima-san.” She turns back around to find Ushijima standing in front of her, patiently holding out a cup of tea in a saucer. Kei smiles, feeling utterly charmed, and takes it. Ushijima leads them back into the living room, taking a seat on a dark sofa. “Please, make yourself comfortable.”

Kei sits an arm’s length away, folding her legs underneath herself. They sit in companionable silence, sipping their tea and Kei continues to admire the calm atmosphere. After she sets her empty teacup on the coffee table, she notices that Ushijima has been barefooted this whole time; their toenails are painted a deep plum color, and Kei thinks: _I like this person so, so much_.

Kei looks up to see Ushijima looking at her, leaning sideways against the back of the sofa with their legs tucked underneath them. Their attention is totally and completely focused on Kei, and she cannot say that she dislikes it at all. Her cheeks and ears flush, and suddenly the only thing that matters is looking into Ushijima’s calm, patient eyes as they look back at her. If she wasn’t half in love before, she certainly is now.

Kei doesn’t know how much time passes. Minutes, hours, days - none of that seems to matter nearly as much as it did before. What good is measuring how time passes when one can just look at Ushijima Wakatoshi and be looked at in return? 

“Tsukishima-san,” Ushijima says, quietly. “I feel…” they trail off with a small frown, like they’re trying to figure out what words are the right words. Kei waits, looking at the lines between their eyebrows and the way their eyes search the air in front of them, as if the words they’re looking for will appear in front of their face.

Ushijima tries again. “I don’t usually feel this comfortable around someone unless I’ve known them for a long time.”

Kei hears the implications - what has taken others time and patience and effort, has been achieved by her after knowing Ushijima for less than a month. They have each been vulnerable with each other today, and the longer they sit here together the longer the exposure continues. Yet, neither of them are in any rush to cover things up or hide away from each other - they are making the choice to just _be_ , here in this house, in this room, in this bubble of warmth and quiet they surround themselves in. 

Ushijima Wakatoshi says what they mean, and Kei feels their statement like the confession that it is. She speaks into the space between them: “Can I come closer?” 

Ushijima nods, slowly. Kei moves to sit on her folded legs on the cushion between them. She looks at Ushijima’s face, the hint of anxiety in their eyes and the pink on their cheeks. “May I touch you?”

Ushijima’s response is barely above a whisper. “Yes.”

Kei reaches out, taking one of Ushijima’s large, warm hands in hers. She cradles it close to her chest, pressing her lips to their knuckles. Her gaze stays on their face, ready to stop at any second. This is the most intimate thing Kei has ever done; her heart is racing and beating so strongly she’s sure the sound pierces through the air between them. She keeps Ushijima’s hand there, and sees their other hand curl into the fabric of their dress. 

“Tsukishima-san,” Kei looks at them, gaze steady. They raise their hand and let it hover in the space between them. “May I…?”

“Yes.” 

She closes her eyes as fingertips touch her cheek, tracing over her cheekbone and around the shape of her ear before settling on the nape of her neck. She runs the fingertips of her left hand down the skin of Ushijima’s arm, still holding their hand in her right, and opens her eyes. 

Ushijima is beautiful in the afternoon light.

Kei reaches out and rests her hand on the curve of their shoulder, her thumb sweeping over the soft purple fabric of Ushijima’s dress. They look at each other, searching each other’s faces for discomfort or anxiety, finding neither. One of them asks the question, the other gives their consent, and the two of them close the gap.

Neither knows how long the kiss lasts, and time is unimportant here, anyway. Kei feels her universe expanding to accommodate the new addition to her solar system; somewhere else inside of her, she finds a hidden door. She opens the door to that secret room, and she is standing in the middle of it, arms outstretched on either side of her body, allowing herself to absorb the full strength of her careful heart.

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first haikyuu fic! i didn't edit it as much as i could've bc i was too excited to share this with the internet!! 
> 
> i'd love to know your thoughts, if you'd like to share them! thank you so much for reading!!


End file.
